My Faith as a Motion Activated Paper Towel Dispenser

Ever get caught in the bathroom waving your hands frantically in front of the paper towel dispenser in the presence of several people only to discover that the thing is crank operated?  That whole scenario speaks volumes to my faith issues.  So often I feel as if my appeals to a higher power amount to nothing more than callous posturing, or perhaps a gluttonous appetite for pathologically good fortune.  Who am I to assume that a mere frenzied waving of my hands would produce a torrent of hot air, much less an unmitigated stream of good tidings?

But the faith thing works.  Pick your flavor – in my case it was Lutheran (ELCA) – but establish a dialog with that higher being.  Don’t let making an idiot out of yourself shake your faith. Hand waving is excused, maybe even encouraged – heck, gyrate your hips if you feel the need.  Being morbidly egocentric is generally allowed.  Results can happen.    I’d share my story with you, but it’s so gruesomely personal that I’ll probably post it on that other blog.

Thomas Merton wrote that he suffered what sounded very much like panic attacks as a result of the crushing weight of his own emptiness.  Panic attacks are a bad deal, trust me.  We’re not in this alone.  Go for the spiritual IV.  Get hooked up in some way, shape or form.

Guess I felt like preaching today… stranger things have happened.  Sorry!



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